Metanoia
by Cerulean's Skies
Summary: Everything we do has consequences and Ayaka will have to face the consequences of her actions... ( AU )
1. Actions and her Consequences

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation**

When they said Ayaka was missing he wasn't expecting to see her at a bar hunched over at the corner, sitting alone, ignoring everyone around her as she stared at the drink in her hands. The lights from the counter illuminate her face, making the unhappy lines on her face that were etched deeply and the unmistakable frown on her face evident. The frown tugs the corners of her mouth down at the corners and her eyebrows are crunched together like two trains in a crash.

" How'd you get the bartender to give you alcohol?" He was already standing behind her. And he saw her flinch upon hearing his voice but she quickly covered it up. She didn't even turn to look at him.

He pulled a bar stool and sat down, gesturing the bartender for the usual. Without a word the bartender brought him a shot of whiskey.

" What are you doing here, Eiri-san?" She asked timidly. Her words aren't slurred... yet so that means she hasn't drank and was still staring at the drink.

Eiri sipped the whiskey, sighing deeply as the alcohol brought a burning sensation on his throat but a pleasant sensation nonetheless.

" Doesn't matter. But the real question is what are you doing here?" He slumped lower on the bar stool and leaned on the bar for support, glancing at her. He wasn't really looking for her. He just came here to have a drink but unexpectedly she was here too.

" I'm drinking," She said uneasily in a low tone as if she was unsure of herself.

" Obviously," Eiri fought the urge to roll his eyes," So why aren't you drinking yet?" He pointed at the glass of vodka she was holding.

She looked taken aback for a moment but quickly regained a neutral expression," Aren't you going to stop me?"

" Why would I?" He shrugged casually," True, you're a minor and you shouldn't be drinking but this is your life and whatever you do is up to you."

She knew the hidden meaning of his words; he just didn't give a shit about what happens to her. He only cares about that pink haired rock star, Shuichi Shindou. It's always been like that.

Ayaka tossed back the drink in one gulp, coughing as the alcohol burned her chest and made her want to throw up. But she can't, she needs to do this.

And besides Eiri wouldn't care or mind if she gets drunk.

He is the reason why she is drinking her ass out tonight. Drinking away her problems till she pass out maybe.

" You know..." She said after downing her fifth glass. Her words came out slurred," I always believed love is a fairytale and I always believed you were my prince charming and I still do but . . . ," Her voice cracked and she choked down a sob. She clamped a hand on her mouth to block the sobs," I could never be your princess," She turned to meet his eye and smiled. Even with tears in her eyes she still gave him a tight smile. One that seemed force.

" Usami-san, you're drunk. You 're talking nonsense," He said matter of factly.

She giggled," Didn't you know people tell the truth when they're drunk?"

" Eiri-san... I always want what makes you happy and . . . and if you're happiness lies with him then I'm not gonna stand in your way," She said in a sad low tone while tracing the rim of her glass with her index finger.

* * *

He moaned into her mouth as her tongue pushed past his lips. Her tongue rolled and swirled against his. He sucked, she flicked and both began to messily tear at each other's clothes from their bodies to the floor beneath, both drove by the alcohol and lust.

They parted lips for a second when he lifted her shirt over her shoulders. He slipped his arm to loop behind her back and unhooked her bra expertly. Ayaka's breasts bounced out of the cups and revealed erect pink nipples. He pressed her closer and wrapped his lips around a pert nipple. Ayaka moaned as he sucked on the nub, running his tongue and teeth whilst he teased the other with his free hand. She threw her hands on his blonde hair and pushed him in further. He traced butterfly kisses over her neck and bit as she gave a cry of pleasure.

Erie groaned as he pressed his hips against hers which Ayaka responded with a moan as she felt his hard- on. She touched over his belt and simply undid it, slowly taking the zipper in hand, it was lowered. He watched as she pulled his trousers from his lower half roughly as she lustfully eyes his boxers. Running her tongue over her lips, she inched the waistband down and with a swift grasp, his throbbing member in hand. He gasped as he pulled back, his hand sliding from her breasts down to her buttocks, hooking his thumb beneath the elastic of her underwear then he slipped the damp underwear down her knees.

He hovered over her as he pulled her legs apart . Her pussy was really wet and dripping from arousal. He runs his fingers down her slit as she moaned. He inserts a finger pushing them in and then thrusting them in and out, harder and harder. He feels just how tight she will be as she clamps down on his finger. With his left hand he strokes her clit to increase the pleasure.

He adds a second finger as he pushed deep, stretching her and she moans louder than before.

" M-more..." She manages to moan out, panting heavily.

She screams with pleasure when he shoves three fingers hard and deep inside her pussy. She threw her head back as she squeezed her eyes shut. She soon settles down, her hips mirroring every movement of his hand as he pumps three fingers up inside her repeatedly.

He pulled out his fingers and licked her essence off his fingers.

He suddenly dives head first into her wet womanhood and she takes fistful of his blonde hair as she grinds his face harder into her private part.

Her thighs are spread wide, open and encouraging as he eats her out with that devilish tongue of his. He continues sucking her as a finger makes its way to her tight wall. His finger pumps into her and his devilish tongue continues pleasuring her. She responded by bucking her hips against his finger.

" E-Eiriiiiiii ! ! !" She arched her back when the heat between her thighs became unbearable and she came.

He pulled out of her and poked his finger into his mouth, licking off the cum.

" Please..." She moans.

" Please what?" He rubbed the tip of his hard length against her dripping pussy teasingly but not entering her yet.

" Fuck me."

He thrusts into her with a grunt.

" Fuck. You're fucking tight," He groaned as he continued sliding into her until he came to a barrier.

In a second he tore through the barrier as he quickly slammed his hips against hers and Ayaka let out a pain strained cry as blood ooze out of her.

He gives her time to get used to his size before moving. He had to go slowly at first because Ayaka was so tight. She was so tight, hot, and wet as if begging him to thrust harder and harder. She moaned as Eiri slid his cock deeper inch by inch as she wrapped her legs around his waist.

He pulled back only to slam back into her earning a loud cry of pleasure. He continued thrusting over and over again into her, pulling out until the tip was left and thrusting back in.

When he was buried hilt deep into her her walls tightened and gripped him like a vice, silky glove as she moaned and thrust back.

He gripped her hips as he pumps her onto him. The pace increases as the thrusts become harder and faster.

He positioned her legs on his shoulders, the pressure bringing both of them more pleasure as he grinds his hips into her. She moaned as she was brought to a new height of pleasure. Ayaka's moans muffled within his mouth as he kissed her passionately, tongues battling for dominance. Their chest rubbed together with every hard thrust.

He picked up his pace then she began digging her finger unto his back as he felt her walls tighten around him and gripped him.

He continued thrusting into her with wild and drunken abandonment as he feels her orgasm building up. Heated pants and moans left their lips as they neared their limit.

" EIRI ! ! !" Ayaka threw her head back as her juices push against his invading manhood. Her walls crushed around him tightly.

His hands gripped her hips as he trusted inside her faster and faster. He felt his climax. He thrusts once. Twice. Thrice. He moaned as he came, his hot fluid filling her up.

He was too caught up in the heat of the moment that he didn't realize whose name he screamed but Ayaka heard it.

" _Shuichi!"_

He continued riding out his orgasm, thrusting into her further, making sure she receives every ounce of him until he exhausted himself, panting loudly as he threw himself on the bed.

After awhile he pulls out his cock coated with a mix of their cum.

* * *

Sunshine peeked through the window to wash a porcelain colored face with gold. Slowly Ayaka was eased back into the world of the living and out of the wonderful world of slumber.

Upon waking up pain greeted her, excruciating pain. Her head is pounding and she feels nauseated and all she wants to do is to curl up in bed and sleep but she can't. Not when she's in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room.

She noticed layers of blonde peeking out from the covers from beside her, only to gasp in her horror when she realized who it is.

Eiri Uesugi

His eyelids closed against the glare of the sunshine and his breathing deep and relaxed, all the muscles in his face and body were totally at peace. His hair fell across his face and she wanted to brush it off to reveal his sharp, beautiful face but it was not her place to do that. He looked kinder in his sleep and she wished he could stay like that, not cold, stoic, and sarcastic.

She wants to crawl into a hole and die. She just had a freaking one night stand with Eiri Uesugi. The guy who didn't love her and never will. She felt a pang of pain and her chest felt heavy.

Getting out of bed, ignoring the excruciating pain in her mind and body, she looked for her clothes. She quickly dressed and left without a word before he could see her.

* * *

When Eiri woke up he felt the infamous hangover but that wasn't what caught his attention it was the scratches and nail shaped marks on his arms and probably his back. He was naked and there was that feeling on his groin. He also wasn't in his room, probably a hotel. He put two and two together and he obviously had a drunken sex with someone last night. But unlike his other one night stands where he'd wake up and find the girl still there she was gone and he couldn't even remember who she was with the throbbing pain in his head. Not that it was a bad thing. He could smell her scent lingering and somehow it smells and feels familiar.

* * *

The pink "+" was staring back at her from its plastic casing.

Positive

She stared at the test as she sat on the cold tiles of the bathroom.

She felt the telltale warm foul feeling rising up to her throat, a tingling and burning sensation in her throat as she lowered her head on the toilet bowl and threw up.

She had been spending her whole morning throwing up all week. And now she just confirmed her suspicions were right.

She was pregnant.

With Eiri Uesugi's child.

This could not be happening to her. Tears slid down her pale cheeks as she tried blocking off the sobs by clamping both hands on her mouth but to no avail. Great heavy sobs wracked her body as he shoulder trembled with the ferocity of her crying. She touched her currently flat stomach.

She was going to be a mother.

 **AN: THANKS FOR READING AND PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW.**


	2. Three Years Later

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation**

 **3 years later...**

He was back at home, the last place he wanted to be. The air was crisp and it was warm sunny morning, perfect for taking long walks and that was what he was currently doing right. He wanted to escape that place, too many unwanted memories.

He came to a stop by the lake. The water was still, calm with the occasional ripples. Surrounding the lake is a beautiful variety of trees. Birds are passing over and in the background the cicadas are crying. When the wind blows the sun reflection makes the ripples glimmer. A fish breaks the surface of the water.

How long had he last been here?

An orange ball rolls and stops at his feet, interrupting his trance.

A kid comes running," That's my ball."

He picks the ball up and hands them to the kid.

" Thankchu."

His eyes raced over the small figure . He had messy blonde hair with slight brown parts. His eyes were light sepia brown and they were warm, almost reminding him of a warm glow in the early morn and somehow it felt familiar.

He was wearing a grey long sleeves with a picture of a panda and navy blue rollup trousers.

If he hadn't known better he could say that this kid was an exact mirror image of himself, only younger and except the warm eyes. His eyes were cold unlike the kid's.

Eiri knelt down to his level," Where's your mommy, kiddo?"

The kid opened his mouth to speak but was cut off.

" Akira!"

Both heads turned to see a brunette running towards their direction.

Eiri stared wide eyed as he realized the brunette was someone he knew.

Ayaka Usami

Her mahogany colored hair was tied into a pony tail. That was definitely her. There was also this thought that registered in his mind.

Ayaka didn't acknowledge his presence and went to the kid's side which name was apparently Akira, holding the kid's hand.

Ayaka looked up to acknowledge his presence only for her face to go slack and her eyes widened.

" E-Eiri- s-san?"

A scowl worked its way to his face," Why didn't you tell me?"

She didn't answer his question and bent down to Akira's level," Aki, go play back at the day care. Mommy will follow, okay?"

Akira nodded," Okay," And then he ran to the day care which was apparently located just near the lake.

Akaya quietly stood up.

" Does he know?"

" What does he have to know?" Ayaka glared daggers at him.

He scowled," Why didn't you tell me?" He asked through gritted teeth. He wasn't blind and he certainly wasn't stupid to not know that the kid was his.

" So what? So you could take him away from me? Not a chance, Uesugi. I won't give him to you even if hell freezes over," She responded with a scowl of her own too.

" I have a right to know and so does he," He narrowed his gaze at her.

" You lost that right the moment you chose someone else over us."

" Yes, because I knew I got you pregnant and had a son," His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

" Don't get cocky with me, Uesugi. You don't know what I've been through these past three years and you just come waltzing into our lives like you didn't do anything wrong? Get lost. Go back to Tokyo and to your lover's loving arms."

" We're not together anymore," He spat back," But I want my son."

" Your son? You have no right to call him that. And you certainly have no right to take him away from me!"

" At least tell him I'm his father!"

" Don't-"

" He has the right to know. And besides every child needs a father. Don't you think it's just right for him to know?... Please," He said the last word in a low soft voice.

Ayaka knew he barely said that word and it might have been hard for him to say that.

She lets out an exasperated sigh," Fine."

She walked toward the day care centre with Eiri following her behind.

They found him playing at the playground located in the front of the building.

" Aki," Ayaka started slowly.

Akira looked up from his toys to see his mommy looking worried and the blonde man from earlier behind her.

Ayaka knelt down to his level," Listen. Mommy's gonna tell you something important, okay?"

Akira just nodded.

" That man... is your daddy," She gestured at Eiri.

Akira blinked his eyes innocently and tilted his head. What he said next surprised Eiri," What'sa daddy?"

Ayaka opened her mouth to respond but Eiri interjected.

" A daddy is someone who teaches you new things, helps you grow. He can put a smile on your face. He'd watch you grow through the years. He'll wipe your tears and hold you," By now he was kneeling down to Akira's level and looking at the kid closer.

" Just layk a mommy?" Akira asked in confusion.

"Maybe," He replied.

Ayaka cleared her throat," Akira, it's time to go home now. Say goodbye."

" Can I give daddy a buh-bye hug?"

Ayaka nodded in agreement," Okay, sweetheart."

Akira hugged him, wrapping his small arms around his neck. He instantly returned the hug, wrapping his arms around the small figure.

" Bye Daddy."

" Goodbye, Akira."

Akira lets go and pulls back, running to his mommy. Before getting inside the car Akira looks back to him and waves goodbye. He waves back.

 **AN: R & R... FROM NOW ON, IT'S NOT GOING TO BE HAPPY FAMILY MOMENTS ALL THE TIME. IT IS AFTER ALL ENTITLED SOLEMN AND THIS IS NOT ENTIRELY A LOVE STORY WITH MUSHY GUSHY LOVE**


	3. An Unexpected Visitor

She was at peace and serenity, her consciousness swirled in the wonderful land of dreams, oblivious to the physical world.

But then all good things must come to an end. The doorbell cut through the serenity of her sleep and eased her back to consciousness.

The doorbell rang again. Its sound tinny and loud to her ears, demanding that she leaves her warm comforting bed to go answer the door.

" Coming!" Her voice came out hoarse.

She moaned from the sun light glaring from her window. She opened her eyes as the blurry shapes before her became sharp objects of reality. Yawning as she sat up and stretched. She got up from bed and shuffled sleepily towards the front door as the doorbell kept ringing. Jeez seems like someone wants her attention pretty badly.

" Alright," She rubbed the sleepiness from her eyes as she opened the door.

When she saw who was on the other side of the door she quickly shut the door but Eiri used his foot to keep her from shutting the door.

" What are you doing here?" She narrowed her gaze at him, a slight growl escaped her lips. She was so not a morning person.

" I came to see Akira. And have you just woken up?" He pointed to her messy hair, raising an ever so perfect brow.

"Obviously," She rolled her eyes as she crossed her arms," It's Saturday. One of the only days where I don't have to work and wake up early. And not all normal people come here barging in at 8: 00 in the morning."

" Aren't you gonna let me in?"

It felt like forever before she took a step back, giving him space to come in with a sigh. It was too early for this. She really didn't like him but she was so not in the mood for throwing him out right now.

" How'd you know my address?" She glanced at him as they walked through the hallway, heading to the living room.

" I went to your parent's house but they said you moved to the next town. And I'm surprised even Tatsuha didn't know you were pregnant."

" No one does. Except my family that is," She said in a low tone as if she didn't want to go through that topic. She turned to him," Wait here in the living room. I need to take a bath first and if Akira wakes up, I'll send him to you," She gestured at a couch in the living room then she left to go take a bath, leaving him alone in her living room.

He took a seat on the cream coloured couch. His eyes took in the sight of pictures on a nearby shelf. There was a picture of Akira and it seemed he was one year old in that photo. He was sitting on a fluffy mat while smiling at the camera. And there were also picture of taken during his birthdays. There was also a picture of Ayaka and Akira where in Ayaka was holding Akira who was waving at the camera.

How much had he been missing out?

" Daddy?"

Just like his mom, his blonde hair was dishevelled too. He was dragging a fluffy teddy bear with a blue ribbon in one hand while rubbing the sleepiness from his eyes.

" Good morning," He approached the kid.

Akira lets out a yawn," Good mowning~"

" Sleep well?"

Akira nods," Yeah, I had nice dreams. Where's mommy?"

" Taking a bath," He bent down and carried the kid in his arms.

" Can we watch TV?" Akira points at the flat screen TV in the living room.

" Sure. What do you wanna watch?"

Akira puts his finger on his chin and mused," Hmmm... SpongeBob?"

" Sure-"

" Anyone up for breakfast?" Ayaka walked in the living room, drying her hair with a towel.

" Me!" Akira raised his hand cheerfully.

Ayaka's gaze fell on him," Had breakfast yet?"

" Uh... No."

" Breakfast will be ready soon," She said as she walked out of the living room and into the kitchen.

* * *

Breakfast wasn't as awkward as she expected. As usual Akira kept talking about new stuff he learned and kept asking random question over breakfast. They had pancakes and coffee while Akira had an orange juice. After breakfast she ushered Akira to play in the front yard with his toys.

" Akira," She knelt down to his level, placing her hands on his small shoulders," Why don't you bring your toys outside while mommy and daddy have some adult talk, alright?"

Akira nodded and brought his toys outside to the front yard.

Ayaka led Eiri to the porch where they could still watch over Akira and pulled a seat from the marble table in the front porch.

" Speak. I figured you weren't here to spend some happy happy family times," She said in a serious tone keeping a straight face.

" I want to take custody over Akira."

Ayaka chuckled bitterly," You think it's that easy? You didn't go through all the hardships that I have so you have no right. You didn't go through all that stress, work, tears, pain, and anxiety that I had for the past three years while you were away, having the time of your life. You can't just do that."

" There is a way that we both could have him."

Ayaka raised a slender brow," And what's that?"

" Marriage."

Ayaka grimaced," No way. I didn't end the arrangement just to go back to that again. I'm not that old naive Ayaka who desperately wanted to marry you. I'm not that naive little girl who believed love is meeting prince charming in one afternoon and falling in love with him in just one afternoon. So don't think I'd want to marry you."

" It's for him, not for us."

" Do you think having his parents in a loveless marriage would be good for him? I don't want to pretend."

" And do you think this is good for him? I don't want to pretend too. Pretend that we're a happy family where mommy and daddy live in different places and where in my child and his mommy have different family names from me. If you don't plan on giving him to me then why'd you easily agreed on introducing him to me?"

" Because I want him to experience having a father! Someone who'll tuck him to bed when mommy's tired, someone who'll hold him when he cries, someone who would believe in him, someone who'd give him advice, someone who'd help him with homework, someone who'd secretly give him sweets because mommy refuses to, someone who could be his hero and someone he could look up to," Her voice eventually turned gentler and her voice slightly cracked but she managed to cover it up. She would not let her guard down in front of him. Her gaze fell on Akira playing in the front yard with a toy truck.

There was silence that came after that and it hung heavy in the air around them, suffocating them.

" What happened after that night?"

She took a deep breath, breathing slowly in and out," A week after that I discovered not only did I lose my virginity but I was pregnant as well. My relatives treated me as an embarrassment to the family and shun me. My dad suggested maintaining the marriage with you..."

" _Perhaps you should keep up the marriage. It'll be good for everyone and for the family image as well."_

" _Father... I don't think it's a good idea. He's with someone else right now and they're deeply in love."_

" No one except my family and relatives knew I was pregnant and they tried to keep it that way. After giving birth, I moved to the next town. My parents suggested that I should stay with them because they're worried I can't handle it alone. Life has been fine since then, I work at the day care centre where Akira goes to but then you come waltzing back into our lives, demanding custody or marriage."

" At least let me spend time with him. He is my son after all."

She let out an exasperated sigh," Okay. But no smoking with the kid around. I'm gonna go check on him," She stood up from her seat, walking to where Akira was playing.

He lets out a sigh. He didn't know which was more annoying, the Ayaka from before or the Ayaka now?

He turns his gaze towards where Ayaka and Akira where. Ayaka bends down and kisses Akira's head. He can't help but notice the gentleness in her actions. Anyone with eyes could see that she loves the kid more than her own life even, hell would have to freeze over before he could even take the kid away from her and he was no idiot to not know that. She carried him in her arms as they head towards his direction.

By time they were on the front porch Akira asked a question that took him aback.

" Mommy, why is daddy still here? Do daddies stay for the whole day?"

" I don't know. Eiri-san, why are _**you**_ still here?" She shot him a kind smile which was obviously fake.

" No, daddies are supposed to live together with the baby," Eiri muttered under his breath but Ayaka heard him and shot him a dangerous glare. So instead he answered," Well, I'm making up for the lost time ."

* * *

When it was just him and his son in the living room, watching as the pirate with an eye patch and nose as beaky as the parrot that sat on his broad shoulder sang the show's theme song Akira said something that made him content for once.

" I'm really happy today," Akira beamed.

" Really? And why's that?"

" Because I got to spend time with mommy and daddy today!"

And for once, he let himself smile. A small but genuine smile.

Unbeknownst to the father and son a certain brunette was hiding behind the door, listening on in to their conversation. She felt a tug on her heart, her eyes softened, and a genuine smile forms upon her lips.


	4. You don't Get to Choose

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation**

 **P.S. I'm not good with writing toddler talks so sorry about that.**

" You what?!" Ayaka practically screamed.

Eiri glanced around the room, making sure Akira didn't hear his mom scream," I said I want him to meet his grandmother."

Ayaka's eyes narrowed at the nonchalant blonde in front of her," Are you kidding? Tell me you are. I didn't spend three years hiding him away from your family just so you could introduce him like everything is perfectly fine."

" I'm not. I want him to meet my side of the family and his grandmother would love to see him," He sighed inwardly. Can't this woman live without a day of arguing with him?

He had been visiting them for days now and he finally decided that it was the right time to introduce him to his grandmother since no one in his family knew he had a child.

"I don't trust you to watch him for a day," She gave him an accusing look.

"I heard you were having a meeting so who do you _**trust**_ to watch over him?" Eiri pointed out.

Ayaka gasped," Eavesdropping is a bad habit Eiri Uesagi! And I was gonna call his regular nanny."

" So you trust a nanny over his own father?" Eiri eyed Ayaka.

" Well she'd been taking care of him ever since he was just months old. Plus they'll be staying at my parents' house. Yes, I trust her more than I trust _**you.**_ Do you even know a thing about kids?" She raised an accusing brow at him.

" I think my paternal skills are perfectly fine, thank you very much. So if you had this nanny work for you many times before does this mean you were often away before?" This time it was Eiri's turn to give her an accusing look.

" I had meetings and seminars at the day care center. And maybe..." Ayaka trailed off, muttering her next answer softly with a slight blush on her cheeks,"... some dates."

Eiri fought the urge to facepalm, giving her a deadpanned expression instead," You have a three year old."

" And I'm single," Ayaka glared at him," So it was only natural for me to go on dates."

" Okay, so now would you allow me to bring him to his grandmother so you could go to your _**'date'**_?"

" It's a meeting."

" Really?"

" Of course, don't be ridiculous!"

"Do you want me to tell Akira?"

" No, don't you dare, Eiri Uesagi!"

" Then let me bring him to his grandparents' house."

Ayaka lets out an exasperated sigh," Fine."

Eiri smirked. He knew using this information against her could make her give in. Maybe in the future he could still use this against her. Ayaka glared at him, seeing the smirk on his face.

" Just so you know, I don't trust your so called _**"paternal skills"**_."

Then as if on cue they heard sounds of little footsteps and a little blonde toddler came running into the room.

"Hey kiddo," Eiri walked over to his son and carried him in his arms, positioning him in comfortably.

"Hello daddy!" Akira gave him a toothy grin.

"Guess what?" Eiri smiled which Ayaka always found out of place on his face.

"What?" Akira chirped.

"We're going to visit your grandma," Eiri replied, ruffling Akira's blonde hair which has exactly the same shade as his.

" Granny Akane?" Akira turned to Ayaka, searching for answers, looking at her with that innocent face she loved so much.

Ayaka smiled warmly at her son, "No, your grandma on daddy's side."

"Wreylly?" Akira beamed.

"Yup. Now go get ready, bring anything you'll need, alright?" Eiri put Akira down and as soon as he was put down Akira instantly dashed towards his room, happily yelling an 'okay.'

Ayaka was staring towards the direction Akira run off to with a distant look on her face and it didn't go unnoticed by Eiri.

"What's wrong?"

Her eyes were still glued to that exact spot," I was always wondering…" She trailed off as she turned her head to look at him," Were you like that as a kid too?"

He noticed the look on her face. She had a soft expression instead of the usual guarded expression of hers. She had a slight smile on her face, a sad smile which he didn't quite get. Why would she be feeling sad?

Not knowing how to respond to that, he shrugged," Maybe."

He felt uncomfortable staying in that room after that, somehow the atmosphere changed and he decided to check on Akira in his bedroom.

Moments later, Akira with his dad came out of his room, a blue Superman backpack strapped over his shoulders and a toothy grin on his face. Ayaka smiled before walking over to him and ruffling his hair.

"Be a good boy, alright?"

Akira looked up at her with his soft brown eyes, then looking over at his dad," Isen't mummy coming too?"

"I'm afraid mommy has somewhere to be, Aki but daddy's gonna be there, alright?"

And just like the good little boy he is, he nodded his head in understanding but it was etched on his face how disappointed he is that his mom won't be coming.

"But maybe if mommy gets to finish early then she can catch up," Eiri suddenly suggested.

Akira's face instantly lit up," Wreally?"

Ayaka smiled, seeing the expression," Sure, if I finish early, that is."

"Okay, let's go then," Eiri said, gesturing at the door.

Ayaka knelt down in front of Akira and kissed his head," I'll see you later, okay?"

Akira nodded and wrapped his little arms around his mom's neck before walking over to his dad," Buh-bye mom."

All throughout the ride Akira was grinning enthusiastically. Eiri felt himself smile as he watched the kid from the corner of his eyes, happily looking outside the car window, observing everything they passed through.

"We're here," He said as he pulled over in front of their family home then unbuckled his seatbelt and his son's.

An old woman with graying hair with few wrinkles gracing her visage and soft pools of brown came out of the house, wondering who just arrived. When he and Akira emerged from his car he could've sworn his mother's jaw practically drop and her eyes widened when her gaze landed on the little boy clutching the hem of his shirt.

A long and serious explanation followed after that but not before ushering Akira into the backyard (where they could just watch over him) to play and explaining to him that the adults were having a talk. That was no doubt the longest 20 minutes of his life and Tatsuha snickering while jokingly commenting about how he 'knocked up Ayaka-chan' to which earned him the most intimidating glare of the century and ended up with their mother separating them to avoid them from beating each other up, more like to avoid him from beating his younger brother black and blue, and Mika shaking her head. Yes, adults.

"YES!" Tatsuha whooped and began having his little victory dance in the living room, practically throwing the controller from his hands.

They were currently playing video games in the den while Eiri was casually sitting at a table behind them. They just finished dinner and Tatsuha decided that he wanted to have a "bonding" with his long lost baby nephew (to which Eiri pointed out that he wasn't really lost). Eiri decided then to keep an eye on them, he was more worried about what Tatsuha would do than what Akira would do.

Sipping his coffee, Eiri nonchalantly spoke," You're celebrating because you beat a three year old at a super Mario game?"

Before Tatsuha could even give a good come back Akira suddenly said in a deadpanned expression," That was one out of fowr, old man."

Tatsuha's eye twitched at this and Eiri couldn't help but smirk, feeling proud of his little boy," O-old man? That's too mean, Akira-chan. It's uncle Tatsuha. Un-cle Tat-su-ha."

"Stohp calling me that," Akira said, ignoring what he just said about calling him Uncle.

Tatsuha ruffled the little boy's blonde hair," And besides your previous wins were just luck. And uncle Tatsuha says you're luck has ran out."

" And I say awen't you too old to be calling youself in thurd person? And luck dowsen't happen three times," Akira brought three of his fingers up, indicating said three times.

Eiri snickered inwardly.

Tatsuha was about to reply when the sound of someone pulling over in front of their house caught their attention. Eiri sauntered over towards the window, sliding it slowly and peeking. He didn't need to see to know who it was but he did anyways. His eyes adjusted to dim light of the night and his gaze landed on a blue Toyota. It felt like forever for Ayaka to emerge from her car. He figured she was doing one of those weird exercises she does whenever she's doing something she thinks she's unprepared for and that involves a lot of talking to herself, a lot. He opened the door before she could even knock on it (she was already raising her hand to knock).

"Took you long enough. Chickened out?" He smirked.

"Sh-"

"Ayaka-chan!" Before Ayaka could even take a single step inside Tatsuha had already assaulted her with one heck of a bear hug," Akira-chan and Eiri were being super mean!"

"Eiri exactly sired another him," He added.

"It's good to see you too, Tatsuha-kun," She smiled, patting him on the back.

Tatsuha pulled back, grinning with a gleam in his eyes. Ayaka and him had always been close and Eiri sometimes wondered why it wasn't Tatsuha who wasn't arranged to marry her instead. Tatsuha had always viewed her as an older sister and at times a younger sister too.

"Mommy!" Akira bounded over to where his mommy was, welcoming her with a hug.

"Hello Aki!" Ayaka swooped him up in her arms and gave him a kiss on the cheeks," How was your day?"

"Okay. Old man keeps why-whi-"

"Whining?" Eiri quipped.

Akira grinned and nodded his head with fervor.

"Ayaka-chan, Eiri's teaching him bad things!" Tatsuha whined.

"See?" Akira grinned.

"I was merely correcting his wording for him," Eiri pointed out and smugly added," Like a good father with _**excellent paternal skills**_ would."

"Old man?" Ayaka questioned, tilting her head in befuddlement, not even humoring the comment he had about paternal skills that was obviously directed to her.

Akira instantly pointed Tatsuha.

"Aki," Ayaka started gently," I told you, pointing is rude."

"Eiri probably taught him that. Excellent paternal skills my ass," Tatsuha grumbled under his breath which didn't go unheard to a certain older brother.

Eiri shot him a glare that promised excruciating pain and anguish.

The sound of someone clearing her throat caught their attentions. They turned their heads towards the source of the sound and were greeted with the sight of Nozomi Uesagi with a tender smile gracing her lips and a soft expression painted on her face.

"Boys, why don't you properly let our guest in?"

They wordlessly stepped back to let Ayaka in and closed the door behind her. Eiri felt Ayaka gulped beside him.

Ayaka on the other hand felt the urge to hightail out of the house stronger than ever and never show her face ever again. Damn Eiri Uesagi! Damn him for subtly telling her son to persuade her! Damn him! Damn him to the 100th layer of hell. She wasn't prepared for this and several talking to herself exercises won't even prepare her for this. It took everything she had to stop her from fidgeting. She was better off staying away from this house, from this family, from Eiri Uesagi all together. If only that blonde narcissist didn't find her and drag her to something she exactly was running away from.

"Have you eaten, dear?" Nozomi Uesagi's naturally motherly voice brought her out of her train of thoughts.

"Yes, we were given a break so we decided to grab a quick bite," Ayaka answered timidly.

"Not a date, eh?" Eiri said under his breath, smirking secretly.

Ayaka secretly stepped on his shoes which earned her a quiet grunt.

"Why don't you boys go upstairs and show Little Aki to your room?"

They wordlessly obeyed and lead Akira upstairs who then asked what's going to which they answered that an "adult talk" was going to take place.

"Please take a seat," Nozomi gestured to seats inside the living room.

Ayaka quietly followed. Nozomi then disappeared into the kitchen and after a few minutes she came back with a tray and tea.

"It's been awhile, Ayaka-chan," She smiled at the somehow uneasy girl after she handed the Ayaka her tea and took a seat herself.

"Yes, indeed it has."

"Oh please, Ayaka, calm down. I won't bite you or something. I merely want to have a pleasant conversation with you."

Ayaka felt herself let out a breath she didn't know she was holding and eventually managed to crack a small smile.

"I was worried when you stopped showing up," Nozomi said.

Ayaka sheepishly rubbed her arms, averting her eyes," Well… I guess the unexpected happened."

Nozomi smiled, a distant look on her face as if she was faraway, reminiscing a distant memory. Nostalgia flashed across her face.

"Ayaka, you had always been a part of this family and you always will. That won't ever change. Even before you were arranged with Eiri you had always been more welcome in this family."

* * *

Akira lay peacefully on the comfy bed, sleeping with his teddy bear clutched in one arm. His breathing even and slow as sleep washed over him. All that playing finally took a toll on him.

"He finally fell asleep, huh? I was almost afraid he won't fall asleep. Kids and their seemingly never ending energy," Tatsuha chuckled.

"Yeah…" Eiri draped the blanket comfortably around the kid.

"So… Ayaka..." Tatsuha started uneasily," I'm almost convinced that fate has a way of bringing you two together."

"Fate? That's bullshit."

Tatsuha smiled," Dad always did like Ayaka, as did mom. She'd always came by the shrine and help. She'd visit us often. Mom and dad thought she was such a lovely and kind girl. Dad thought she was perfect, perfect for you. He thought that if he could get you two to marry then you'd have more reasons to come home more often since you were obviously trying to avoid this place. He didn't choose Ayaka because she was the successor of the infamous temple hotel. She was easy to befriend and it was hard to hate her so I didn't get how you managed to even push her away. She loved you, she ran away just to look for you. She ventured a world that was completely unknown to her just to look for you. She didn't just like you for your looks or fame. And yet you didn't even give her a chance."

"You don't get to choose who you fall in love with, Tatsuha."


	5. Being Hurt Means you're still Alive

When a disheveled Ayaka, more disheveled than usual, opened the door he knew something was wrong. Her hair was messier than usual, brown locks tangled here and there, eyes more droopy and tired than usual and there were dark rims under her eyes.

"You look like a mess," Eiri pointed out, not even bothering to greet good morning just like a normal person would.

Ayaka rolled her eyes but with her eyes looking like an emo zombie's ones it didn't look like her usual sarcastic eye roll," And I feel like one too."

She stepped back to give him space to enter and he did. Her brief coughing didn't go unnoticed by him.

He reached out to feel her forehead only to instantly draw back when he felt as if his hand was burning.

"You're burning up."

"This is just nothing," Ayaka dismissed.

"You still plan on going to work in this condition?" Eiri raised a brow, looking at her in disbelief.

"I have to and I have to drive Akira over to the day care," She said sternly but couldn't help but let out a cough at the end of her sentence.

"I'll drive him. I'm not letting him catch any of that," Eiri gestured over to her.

Ayaka glared at him but due to her condition it wasn't as piercing as usual," I st-"

"And if you plan on going to work, don't you think you're students would be scared of you? I mean you look like a zombie out of those horror films people nowadays keep talking about," Eiri interrupted before she could even finish.

"If I wasn't feeling like hell right now I'd kick you out of my house."

 **.**

 **.**

"Why is daddy dryving?" Akira asked after he helped him in the car and buckled his seat belt for him.

"Well mommy is sick so she can't drive you to school today," Eiri said before starting the engine.

After driving Akira to the day care and telling him that he would also be picking him up after he drove back to the house.

"You're still here?" Ayaka's voice sounded hoarse.

She was laying in bed, curled up and hugging her pillow.

"I don't want to be blamed for your death if you end up dying here," Eiri said flatly.

She heard the hidden 'I'm going to take care of you so deal with it and suck it up' in his words. She groaned and buried her head on to the pillow as another wave of nausea hit her.

"Just give me medicine," She grunted.

Eiri turned on his heel and disappeared into the bathroom. As he looked through the medicine cabinet a thought hit him, he was starting to get familiar and accustomed around the house, too familiar perhaps. He knew his way around the house like he owns it. When he found the medicine he was looking for he got a glass of water and returned to the room.

"Finally," Ayaka said weakly, letting out a cough.

He handed her the medicine and the glass of water which she quickly took, sitting up, popping the cap open and gulping them down into her throat then washing it down it water. She sluggishly placed the glass on the nightstand that Eiri almost reached out to do it for her.

She shuddered and brought a hand to her head, falling back to a laying position. She pulls the covers higher and closer to her.

"I'll just sleep it off. You can go now," Ayaka breathed.

"No, I'm not leaving yet. I'll be downstairs if you need me," He said before leaving and heading downstairs.

* * *

It happened fast, too fast that he didn't know how he should react to it. He was searching channel to channel for at least a decent show that could help him kill time. There he was lounging on the couch and clicking the remote away when…

" _ **Aspiring rock star Shuichi Shindou and famous actress Hoshimi Tsukino finally made their relationship official and they're apparently going strong…"**_

He froze as his eyes were glued to the TV playing a footage of Shuichi and that girl. He stayed rooted to that very spot. It was like everything around him was in fast-forward and he stayed there, motionless in the middle of it all. Everything was happening too fast. He was moving on too fast and here he was, still stuck and not even moving one bit.

The next thing he knew he was staring at a blank screen of the TV and was trying his best not to chuck the remote in his hand. He was so not in the mood for Ayaka berating him about the difference of a remote and a ball.

* * *

"See? I'm fine," Ayaka tried standing up only to be pushed back by him.

"No, you're not," He hissed, narrowing his eyes at her," In case that stubborn head of yours forgot to process, you're not fine, you have a fever and you're staying put."

"I'm _**fine**_ ," Ayaka said between gritted teeth.

"I'm not sure if you're just so stubborn or plain stupid."

"I just need a walk and some fresh air," Ayaka said, trying to sit up only to succeed without Eiri trying to push her back this time.

He paused to think about it, sighing," Okay."

Slinging her legs over the bed, she carefully tried to stand up.

"Were you on your way to pick up Akira?" Ayaka asked.

He looked at his watch to confirm the time," No, not for another three hours. Why?"

"Well the day care is a walking distance away from here..." She smiled subtly, trailing off.

"You want to walk all the way over there?"

"Well why not? The weather outside's better than ever," She gestured to the window.

After grabbing her coat she stubbornly walked outside and all he could do was sigh, curse the _**woman**_ under his breath and follow her outside.

She was right, the weather outside was indeed better than ever however he's never going to admit that openly to her.

The walk was quiet and peaceful, devoid of any exchange of words which both of them were grateful. The silence gave Eiri the chance to mull over what happened awhile ago and that inevitably lead to a certain rock star.

Meanwhile Ayaka was just enjoying the silence and the tranquility the stroll had brought her. She was feeling better but not exactly healed of her fever. She always was the type to enjoy nice quiet strolls.

They eventually reached the lake. The water was tranquil and calm. The trees surrounding the lake were slightly swaying as a cool breeze passed by, also making ripples appear in the water.

The pebbles crunched under their shoes as they approached the lake nearer. Eiri decided to sit and Ayaka couldn't help but notice the look on his face as he gazed at the lake in front of them.

"Eiri..." She started as a flashback of what she witnessed earlier that day flooded her mind, taking a seat herself she spoke," We weren't brought into this world to be loved, we were brought into this world to love."

She heard Eiri chuckle bitterly," You saw?"

She nodded her head. It was an accident, honestly. She was thirsty and decided to go downstairs for a glass of water when she suddenly heard the announcement on the TV and she couldn't help it when her gaze landed on Eiri who stared emotionlessly on the TV. His face might not have been betraying him but she knew. She knew what he was feeling deep inside and it was the exact opposite what he was showing on the outside.

"Look, I'm not gonna be cliché and tell you those move on bullshit. He moved on so? Doesn't mean you have to force yourself to do the same. I know how much you need to die over and over again to finally attain the words 'move on.' But Eiri, don't hide the fact that you're hur-"

"I'm not."

Ayaka smiled at his display of in denial," Accept it. Being hurt means you're still alive."


	6. Rain, Pain, go away

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation**_

The raindrops and wind continued beating against the window as the rain continued pouring and thrumming hard outside. The great sheet of rain was dropping big sopping drops of moisture outside. The rain is hissing and thunking off the roof.

Eiri sighed as he stared outside the window.

"Looks like the weather isn't on your side tonight," Ayaka pointed out as she followed his gaze.

"Yeah, I guess I'll be spending the night here then."

"Yeey..! Daddy will stay," Akira cheered, grinning toothily. Then he suddenly perked up," Will mommy and daddy be sleeping on the same bed?"

This caused both adults to stiffen, both averting their gaze from each other.

"O-of course not, what made you say that, Aki?" Ayaka asked, trying to muster up a smile.

"My classmate sed that his mommy and daddy sleep on the same bed," Akira said, tilting his head adorably to the side.

"Well..." Ayaka tried to come up with a good enough excuse, and fast.

"Mommy has cooties," Eiri blurted out which made Ayaka glare daggers at him.

"And daddy's a restless sleeper," Ayaka shot back.

"Akira," Ayaka started, swooping the child in her arms when she saw him yawn," It's bed time for you."

"B-but mom," His words were cut off by a yawn, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"See? You're tired. Now let's get you to bed."

"But I wanna play with daddy mowre," Akira pouted, looking at her with pleading eyes.

"Don't worry, daddy would still be here when you wake up," Eiri said, with reassurance lacing his words.

"Really?" Akira lit up.

Eiri nodded.

Ayaka with a sleepy Akira in her arms and Eiri following close by then proceeded upstairs. They both tucked the boy in his bed after Ayaka kissed him in the forehead. They said their goodnights then quietly exited the room as Eiri softly closed the door.

"That kid, I swear..." Ayaka vaguely shook her head.

"I'm pretty sure he gets his stubbornness from you, no doubt," Eiri pointed out.

"Actually he got that from you," Ayaka can't help roll her eyes.

"Well you're the stubborn one here."

Ayaka gave him a 'really?' look.

They both found themselves walking towards the large floor to ceiling window at the end of the hall. The pitter-patter of the rain resounded as it hit the window.

Ayaka wordlessly left to go downstairs. When she came back she had two mugs of hot coffee in her hands. She handed one to Eiri which he gladly accepted.

She then sat by the window, regarding the rain continuously pouring outside through the window. Eiri followed suit, sitting across her.

"Do you know the story of the sky and the nymph?" She quietly asked, her gaze glued to the spectacle outside.

"No."

"Well, the sky once had a wife she was a nymph. They loved each other and were happy but then... the Sky started to become cruel and grumpy. After bearing for a very long time the nymph took off, unable to handle his attitude any longer. The sky searched and searched and searched for her, to no avail. She was gone, disappeared into thin air. And every time he can't handle his loss the sky weeps and it rains."

"You think he's still looking for her?" Eiri asked.

She paused, a moment of hesitation," I like to think that he is."

She noticed the faint upward tug of the side of his lips, signifying his amusement.

* * *

"You're letting me sleep on the couch in the living room?"

"Yes," Ayaka answered flatly.

"No," Eiri said firmly.

"Yes, you. are."

"No, it's too cold, _**Ayaka Usami**_ ," Eiri enunciated.

Ayaka sighed," Fine, you can sleep in my room."

Just as Eiri was supposed to let out a victory smirk Ayaka added," On the floor."

"Of course," Eiri sarcastically said.

She lead him into his bedroom after that. It was modest in size. There was a medium sized bed in the center with a lamp at the side. Contrary to what he believed, Ayaka didn't have _**those**_ girly things in her room. Papers and files were neatly piled on her desk and there was a bookshelf. Seems like Ayaka Usami was fond of books, seeing as she also have a bookshelf in her living room.

"I have a spare futon somewhere in here," She said as she searched in her closet for said futon.

"Here," She said as pulled out what she was looking for and handed it to Eiri.

While Ayaka was preparing for bed inside the bathroom at the corner of her room, Eiri had already set his futon and was already lying on his back, finding himself staring at the ceiling.

"Comfy?" Ayaka asked. He didn't even hear her exit the bathroom.

"I'll live."

Ayaka gingerly got into bed, throwing the covers on herself. It was still pouring outside.

"Care to share what's on your mind?" Ayaka suddenly uttered as she too stared at the ceiling.

Eiri was silent for awhile," My life as of the moment."

"Of course, if someone stares at the ceiling it's always about life and not about a certain rockstar," Ayaka scoffed.

She may not be able to see it but she knows he was glaring at her with such intensity.

"Well atleast I have a life," Eiri shot back.

Ayaka instantly shot up in bed, sitting up and looking over at Eiri," Hey I so have a life!"

"Really?" Eiri gave her a side glance.

"Yes! I look after Akira, I bathe him, I feed him, I drive him to school, I teach," Ayaka said while counting off on her fingers.

"Yes, Ayaka, Akira has a life," Eiri pointed out with a dry look.

"I have a life I- I..."

"Give it up, Usami, you don't," Eiri cut her off.

"I go on dates!"

"On blind dates. Which means you're pretty desperate," Eiri pointed out," And don't get me started on your lovelife which doesn't exist even more."

And that ended with a pillow on his face that Ayaka threw in the moment of fury at him.

"I hate you, Eiri Uesagi! I hate you!" Ayaka spat as she buried her face on her only remaining pillow.

Eiri can't help but smile and laugh inwardly. Ayaka could be childish at times...

 **AN: THANKS FOR READING AND PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW**


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